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What started out as a site to update on our daughter's cancer has thankfully grown into a site to update on our beautiful family of four. Enjoy our journey...

Saturday, May 26, 2007

sometimes bad isn't always THAT bad...

As I sit in our hospital room - this is what I see...
My wonderful husband crashed on the "couch" sleeping so peacefully. Three feet to the left of him is our (nearly) 10 month old baby girl, sleeping so beautifully. She is has no idea what is going on today, or in the days past - and we hope her life (as she knows it) won't be effected. So, really...when is it all said and done, what we are going through...is it really THAT bad?

Don't get me wrong, it is a living hell to be Chad and I (and other friends and family) but we are just bystanders...ya know?

I was just sitting on the desk in Charli's room, looking out the window at all the cars going by - thinking that I have no idea what those peoples lives are like. It is true that I feel we have had our share of hardships, but there is no quota for heartache...so dwelling on the past ones won't do any good! In reality, if it weren't for all the bad, the good wouldn't mean anything. Everyone has heartache.

What I am trying to say, is that underneath all the heartache and pain we have had over the past three months, I couldn’t ask to change anything. Obviously, I would love for Charli to be cancer free. However, going through this process has put so much of life into perspective for my family…and I hope for others too.

When all of this is said and done I hope to say, “Hi, my name is Brenda. My daughter is a neuroblastoma survivor, and my life has been enriched because of it!” I pray that through her diagnosis we will make a difference for someone who will be diagnosed in years to come, and that the world will be a different and better place because of all of this. I truly believe this will happen, and it will be because of YOUR love and support.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

i guess that is true...we really dont know what other's are experiencing,but its still very hard!we wish you the best of luck!! hugs

cheryl sorenson said...

Hi, I hope your Saturday is going well! I have been swamped and have not been on babyfit much but i wanted to check in on Charli. In your message today you wrote that you hope that others gain from this experience in some way so her and the family's pain is not at a loss. I treasure every moment with our little ones and give them a little extra squeeze every time I can! Please know that hearing about Charli always encourages me to say a little prayer for her and appreciate what I have as well! I have been so inspired by your journey and I can't wait till we can look back 10 years from now and the only worry will be what these 11 year old's are up to! :) We are all gaining so much from all of you and your story. It makes me sad that sometimes we have to get the picture from seeing someone so innocent go through horrid things. Life is such a crazy road!

Have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend! babysorenson

Stacy from Michigan said...

For so many of us it takes something tragic like nb to make us really, really, realize how good our life truly is!!!
To make us squeeze a hug a little tighter, to stop and look at our sleeping children a little longer, to find comfort in a little sibling rivalry...because it would be awfully quiet in the house without it!!!
So tonight I pray that you will be able to someday say that your daughter is an nb survivor and that we will all walk away with our lives more enriched because of a little miracle named Charli. Good night and God Bless!

Anonymous said...

Brenda, if only I were as strong as you are........can you really be my daughter?? My prayers continue daily that Charli will be able to play and run with the other grandkids and we can all be on the farm looking for the baby kittens, etc. together. You are an inspiration to me also. Mom

NB Warrior said...

Brenda you are amazing! stay strong and your daughter will be strong as well. Charli will beat this thing and our daughters will play together!! =)

Hope you are having a good weekend.

Anonymous said...

Brenda. What a nice way to start my Sunday by reading your post from yesterday. You have such a fresh and positive view on what seems like everything! You're right, if we could be a fly on the wall in other people's homes we'd get a glimpse of what we don't even know is going on in their lives. THANK YOU for helping others, like me,remind myself to be thankful for what we DO have each day. XOXO- Courtney

Sadie said...

your positive attitude always astounds me brenda, and i know in no way is my situation with aiden even remotely similar, but with a disability that he will carry for the rest of his life, i know that being told how strong *I* am, only makes us as a whole stronger as well. i envy your positive outlook on nearly every aspect of your life (aside from your packing behaviors when leaving for a trip... which i'm sure are still as anal retentive as ever) and i hope everyone else's life that you and your family have touched, will be able to walk away with a little piece of that.
i love you all.